I SAY, I SAY, I SAY!
A blondie and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blondie, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blondie to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Sceptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blondie so she reads slow: "Come for da bull.”
Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
A: Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
Q: Why do Chinese people have Chinese babies?
A: Because two Wongs don't make a white.
A: Because two Wongs don't make a white.
An tourist walks down a Spanish country when he notices he isn't wearing his watch. A old farmer is resting under a nearby tree. The tourist approaches the farmed and asks, "Excuse me, do you know what time is?" The farmer looks at the donkey, grabs its balls, and replies, "4:30." The tourist asks, "How do you know that?" The farmer replies, "Well I get a handful of the donkeys balls and lift them up so I can see the church clock across in the village.”
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, “Mypenis,” and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, “Error. Not long enough.”
Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer?
The grass tickles their balls.
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After two hours, she stopped nagging and said: 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?' He replied: 'That would be fine with me.' Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Thursday, the swelling went down just enough for him to see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, “Mypenis,” and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, “Error. Not long enough.”
Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer?
The grass tickles their balls.
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After two hours, she stopped nagging and said: 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?' He replied: 'That would be fine with me.' Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Thursday, the swelling went down just enough for him to see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
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